So I was blogging in my sleep last night, and it was good stuff. I mean really good stuff. You know like those dreams when you do all your calculus homework and you’re an utter genius and you feel great. The unfortunate thing that the afore mentioned calculus dream and last night’s have in common is that upon waking…it’s all gone.

My amazing post however is lost in dream world. But I did remember my title, and everything that commences below.

Somewhere around 2AM the battle between my head and bladder started. It’s a nightly battle, one my head seems to think it will win with logic and reason and one my bladder eventually wins through forces of nature and tiny feet. Half conscious and still very foggy my bladder was trying to will me to the bathroom. True to form, my mind was trying to reason it had NOT been long enough since the last time I went, I couldn’t have to go again. Meanwhile my bladder had made a strategic alliance in my subconscious who was ‘entertaining’ me with an endless sequence of poopy diaper dreams.

Enter little feet, ‘mommy’ comes from the side of the bed. Before my sleepy brain has a chance to respond little man is positioned next to me. Immediately out of my mouth comes ‘do you have your diaper on?’ Even as I write this I’m amazed at my ability to remember to check for this crucial detail. We’ve been potty training again, and so far the most significant change this has resulted in is Grant showing up in our bed diaper-less. Why? Who knows.

Good thing I asked, sure enough it was hanging by a thread. I fumbled around in the dark trying to reattach it for quite some time before I realized it was ripped. Upon realizing this I mentally groaned though my bladder was rejoicing as I climbed out of bed. After going to the bathroom, of course, I found a new diaper, climbed back over both men, put the new diaper on little man, threw the old diaper…crap I wonder where that ended up…and laid back down to go to sleep. Most nights that would be the end…

Grant: momma, i have no pillow

me: here baby share mine

a few minutes later…

Grant: momma move closer me.  grabs my hand and puts my arm over him.

a few minutes later…

Grant: momma you hair messy. proceeds to move my hair around the pillow.

Me: go to sleep buddy

Grant: it’s in my face. proceeds to move my hair some more. I roll over.

Me: go to sleep Grant

a few minutes later

Grant: momma I want some water

After an hour of this, Neil gets up, gets water (in the wrong cup mind you), deftly convinces Grant that is OK and puts him back in bed. At this point I started the amazing post in my head. As I’m drifting off to sleep a new war commences.

blogger brain: GET UP AND WRITE THIS DOWN!

pregnant woman: You’ll remember it in the morning…get your sleep.

blogger brain: NOW! YOU’LL FORGET.

pregnant woman: it’s too good to forget, must…get…sleep. 

blogger brain: changing tactics come on, you just need to make notes. You don’t have to do it all now, notes, just notes.

pregnant woman: what kind of crazy do you think I am? Staying up in the middle of the night to make notes for a blog post!!

blogger brain: AAHHH! COME ON! GET UP!

pregnant woman: shut up already, I’ll remember! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz