and there you have it…


May 2011

things i don’t do

I hear people tell me all the time, “I don’t know how you do it all!” Mostly after finding out that I have three kids 4 and under and we both work. I’ve often wondered what these people think I do. I’d venture a guess I do less than they imagine. I’ve been mentally tabulating a list of things I don’t do for the next time I get this comment. However I’ve decided spewing this list on the next unsuspecting person that stumbles upon that magic phrase may not be my best option. So you get it instead.

Things I don’t do (Part 1, like that ambition there)

Windows – even when we had a sliding glass door I didn’t clean it, totally futile in my situation.

Floors – I have amazing childcare that sweeps for me! Mopping does not exist. I also had a roomba for the last 3 years, since we moved I’m trying to figure out how in the world people actually do this regular vaccuuming thing, as of yet, I do not.

Dust – now I do occasionally run my hand across something that is look extra nasty, but that’s about it.

Change sheets – this is done when someone has been sick on a sheet…or a diaper has leaked, but usually only number 2. I know that’s gross, but it’s true. I do change pillow cases more often, like once, sometimes even twice a month!

Wash bedding – like the spreads and stuff, yeah not so much. I did however wash them all when we moved, I guess if we move every few years we’ll be good.

Iron – if something happens to make it in that needs to be ironed, it gets worn wrinkly (kids) or it magically disappears.

Pay bills – everything is on auto pay, those rare weird random bills are generally late.

Clean out the car – yeah I actually found a monstrously huge roach in our car the other day, makes sense, he has a never ending supply of food.

Wash the car – Neil takes the main car through the car wash every few months, the other one never gets washed.

Wake up with my children – after three years of waking up between 5:30-6:30 with our kids Neil’s mother managed to guilt him into getting up with them. Which means he gets up, straps the youngest into his chair and starts a video. Then we both go back to sleep, usually for another hour, sometimes more.

I don’t shop for kids clothes.

Most baskets of clean clothes sit for a few weeks before getting put away.

I don’t clean bathrooms, toilets, occasionally, in the downstairs bath, that’s about it.

We have not had a yard that required maintaining in years, so I no longer do yard work!

Also working means I change virtually no diapers, deal with much less meal times, nap times and toy clean up!

I am now starting to wonder what it is I do all day…


I took my tongue ring out on Wednesday. It was a mildly traumatic experience for me. I’ve known it was going to have to go for a few years now. It was slowly eroding my gums, gross right? But it was slooooow, so slow I let it stay. I mean I’d had the thing almost ten years and it’s not like I’ve lost a tooth or anything close (though I did read horror stories of that online before I pulled the plug).
I felt like I had removed a part of my identity, and I’m not being dramatic.

The whole next day I kept trying to play with it (something I never even realized I did so much of), but it wasn’t there. Eating and drinking felt really weird, like really. I’d already realized I’d lost another hole in my ears this month, the third to just magically disappear. Taking me down to four.

On the plus side my son will no longer be trying to pull it out of my mouth when he nurses, it doesn’t take as long to brush my teeth anymore, and I can’t think of another plus.

I feel like I’ve made some sort of step into something crapy. To make up for it I’m feeling the need to go get my next tattoo! I feel better already.

Here’s a picture. Appropriately taken with a kiddie backdrop. I don’t even know why it’s appropriate, it just feels like it! So deal with it.

first mother’s day

This year felt like a first Mother’s day for me. It was the first year most of my children actually were able to acknowledge the day. With Grant in school now I even got the lovely handmade bracelet featured below. Add that to the multitude of scribbled cards and my flower from church and it felt like a pretty good Mother’s day to me.

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